conniesWebpage

AUGUST 06

6:57 PM 8/7/2006

last week i met up with eunice again in newport beach (twice in one year, this has gotta be a record!) - we window shopped at neiman marcus, and then had dinner and caught talledega nights with andy and ryan. i liked the movie but andy fell asleep during the 2nd half, which means that he either has the attention span of a gnat or i'm just easily amused. it's probably the former. saturday i drove up to playa del rey for tommy's birthday and also saw pam, my long lost stalker. it was so nice to catch up - i almost forgot what it's like to have a social life. now if i could clear some extra time in my schedule to drive around southern california and fly to NYC, SF and DC to say hello to rosa, marina, em, jenny, erin, daniel, wayne and johnny, i'd be all set. OR.... you guys could just all show up at my house in torrance sometime in the next month or two and save me the trouble of traveling. because that's what real friends do. ;)

anyway, i'm going to cut this post short because i've got a mountain of work waiting for me. but since i hate to leave you guys with nothing to look at, here's a picture tom took for me at some zoo in argentina:

isn't it cute? i gave tom lots of crap for thinking of me when he took this picture (me: "what are you trying to say, i remind you of a hippo!? him: "no, i just know you like hippos; i was also gonna take a picture of an orangutan for you as well!" me: "oh, so now i'm a MONKEY!?") one day when i'm filthy rich, i'm going to have a pet hippo, which i will train to trample over people on my command. and when i inevitably end up in jail, my pet hippo will bust through the walls and rescue me. all right, this is why i really shouldn't update when i'm tired because i end up rambling about nonsense. but if anybody knows of where i can score a baby hippo (i gotta train him young so he doesn't end up trampling over ME, that would put a serious dent in my plans), please email me. thanks. i promise i will write something a little more meaningful next week. but for now, i'm out. xoxo!

8:42 PM 8/13/2006

i was cleaning out files on my old hard drive and found this cheat sheet from three years ago - it was when me, keri and lynn tried to give up soda, chips, sweets and fried food for the entire summer. everytime we had moments of weakness (and if you read the whole thing, we were weak pretty much every other day), we would post the date and write some sort of justification for the lack of willpower. it just got more and more pathetic towards the end. me and lynn are still convinced to this day that keri is a big fat liar, because given that girl's sweet tooth, there's no freakin' way she only gave into temptation once. i think she tried to scrape by on some technicality a couple of times - "dude, i didn't give in - that wasn't cake! it was just a fluffy sweet biscuit with chocolate frosting on top!" RIIIIGHT, buddy. i also found these pictures below, which some of you dedicated readers may remember seeing a few years ago.

this is what happens when you finally lose a game of crazy eights to your twisted, vindictive girlfriends whom you've beaten twenty million times in the past. you can thank keri for taking the hot pictures capturing my humilation.

the front was much, much worse than the back. i think the random dude's expression says a lot. i stole the following excerpt from euni's site, since she did a much better job of writing down what went down that day:

Today was officially "OPERATION HUMILIATE CONNIE." Background: Connie and her sadistic best friends, Keri and Lynn, are always playing Crazy 8s for stakes, in order to make the loser suffer great public humiliation. Case in point? Lynn once had to serenade a random guy with Boyz II Men's "I'll Make Love to You" and give him a rose. Most recently, Lynn lost yet again and was forced to go to CJ's (Asian Central) in hideous clothes and with a fake unibrow. Another game was played that night and alas, my beloved roomie, Connie, was the unfortunate victim (Muahahahahaha!). Punishment? Strut herself down BruinWalk in full costume (designed by Keri and Lynn) and ask two tables for directions to somewhere on campus. Not that bad you say? You haven't seen the costume, which includes makeup. Yes, there was a sock on her back, and yes, those are socks on her arms. There was a great full length shot but Connie has forbidden access. But you get the picture... bohemian vixen, hookah on LSD.. right? But I must say, e-Props to Connie who actually had the guts to do this. And provide priceless entertainment for all of those on BruinWalk.

Top Quotes of the BruinWalk Catwalk:

1) "That girl has a sock on her back!" -Random black man who having seen the FRONT only cared about the sock.... go figure
2) "Happy Halloween, Happy Halloween!" -An older gentlemen who didn't seem to be "all there"
3) "I love those candies." -Boy at table when Connie asked him for directions and he saw a "Good and Plenty" patch on her shirt.
4) "You look like a hooker from hell!" -Daniel, via AIM with Connie

hmmm...maybe in my next post, i'll write about how i lost ANOTHER bet three days later, with the outcome of that particular game being 20 million times more embarrassing/nervewracking than my little stroll down Bruinwalk.

this last picture is dedicated to eunice - she might have been a super smart English major at ucla, but she was pretty bad at online scrabble. this was a screenshot of one of our games - i even warned her that "jin" was a real word right before she challenged me, but she didn't listen. check out the score!

all right, that's it for now. one day i will sit down and try to archive everything back to 2001. um, or not. anyway, i had a decent but seriously unproductive weekend so far...saw "step up" friday night, which finally put to rest the whole misconception about white boys not being able to dance. the story was weak and the acting even worse, but the choreography was MIND BLOWING. yes, i said mind blowing. the eye candy was not too bad either. and by "not too bad," i mean "smoking hot." now go see it before you mock me.

i also went to hollywood bowl last night w/ the deputy to see the annual tchaikovsky spectacular. honestly, would it kill the LA phil to showcase the ucla band for once, instead of SUC? the red and yellow uniforms are such an eyesore. i swear, if i have a kid one day who decides to go to USC, i will disown him/her on the spot. first off, that would be the ultimate betrayal. second, there is no way i'm shelling out 30K/year for a sub-par college education. for that amount of cash, my kid better be at harvard or princeton.

all right, back to work. i hope everybody had a great weekend. oh yeah, and i'm almost out of cell minutes for this cycle, so don't be offended if i don't pick up your call - it's probably because i'm trying to avoid another $800 cell phone bill. however, if 9 pm comes and goes and you still don't hear back from me, then it's safe to assume i really don't want to talk to you. haha, jk. well, not really. :) later, everybody.

3:13 PM 8/19/2006

everytime september 15th rolls around, i find myself contemplating a drastic career change. this year i'm looking into the following possibilities:

1. garbage truck driver (pros: excellent benefits and decent hours. cons: having to tell people you're a garbage truck driver),
2. engineer (pros: good pay for minimal amounts of work. cons: dorky wardrobe required), OR...
3. hot dog vendor (pros: all the hot dogs you can eat. cons: all the hot dogs you can eat)

jeez, it's a tough one this time around...by the way, before my inbox gets flooded with hate mail from all of my pissed off engineer friends, let me just say that not ALL of you are terrible dressers. however, a good majority of you are. and i'll let you guys decide which group you're in. just a friendly hint: if you're still wearing the same pants your mom bought you in high school, there's a good chance you're probably not in the GQ category.

i've had to think long and hard about this post - originally i was going to write something totally sarcastic, and then i erased it to put something mildly cute up. but then i grossed myself out so i deleted THAT entry, which means now i have nothing. well, that blows. so now i will have to do a condensed version of both since i have completely wasted the past 20 minutes of my life writing and deleting posts.

ten things i love:

1. busy season at work.
2. my ex-boyfriends.
3. sorority girls from University of Spoiled Children.
4. Denise Richards' fashion sense.
5. seeing the shoes i paid full price for @ bloomingdale's three weeks ago on sale for $80 at nordstroms.
6. menstrual cramps from hell. yes, i typed "menstrual," get over it.
7. bad hair days.
8. hot pink nail polish.
9. gigantic venomous spiders in my shower.
10. fresh roadkill.

ok fine, ten things i REALLY love:

1. my friends.
2. flowers.
3. guys who care enough to send me flowers.
4. reading for fun.
5. brady.
6. donuts.
7. my bird. :) he's the cutest!
8. diamonds.
9. coffee.
10. LA weather.

okay, there you have it. by the way, i'm not kidding about denise richard's fashion sense (or complete lack thereof, to be more accurate). does the woman own anything remotely cute? or does she spend her entire life in ugly jeans and boring spaghetti-strap tank tops with a sweatshirt tied around her waist? DENISE, LISTEN UP. HIRE A STYLIST, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. YOUR LOOKS ARE GONNA FADE IN ABOUT 15 YEARS WHICH WILL LEAVE YOU WITH ABSOLUTELY NOTHING SO YOU MIGHT AS WELL MAKE THE MOST OF WHAT YOU'VE GOT NOW. WHICH IS BASICALLY A NICE BODY, MODERATELY ATTRACTIVE FACE (THOUGH THE NOSE IS A LITTLE WEIRD), AND A GROSS NEW BF (A.K.A. HEATHER LOCKLEAR'S SLOPPY SECONDS). AND WHILE YOU'RE AT IT, PLEASE QUIT POSING IN PLAYBOY, BECAUSE THAT'S GONNA SERIOUSLY TRAUMATIZE YOUR KIDS ONE DAY. YUCK.

all right, i'm glad i got that off my chest. should denise richards ever visit this site (and it's just a matter of time, i'm sure), she'll walk away with some good, heartfelt advice. okay. i hope everybody has a fabulous weekend while i am slaving away at work. again, this is so worth the 0.2% raise coming my way in a month. and since it is not cool to end the post with an unhappy note, here is something that should bring a little bit of sunshine to everybody's lives...

gorgeous! just like me. haha jk. i'm out.

11:14 PM 8/23/2006

i've always felt that the phrase "love at first sight" trivialized the actual notion of love. despite all the cheesy chick-flicks i've watched and shed countless tears over, i've never actually bought into the idea that you could truly love someone within moments of meeting them. until now, that is.

this, my darlings, is true love at first sight. no, not lust. not infatuation. LOVE. it's black crocodile, courtesy of gucci. it's also $14,000. i'm so torn. let's see, do i want to deal crack for the next six months straight to pay off the bag or do i want so sit in a corner of the gucci store and sigh with envy everytime the saleslady brings it down for somebody to look at? i'm thinking i wanna deal crack. c'mon, look at it! don't tell me you wouldn't risk going to jail for something this gorgeous. there's also a black patent leather version for $1,600, which is much more reasonable. hey, my birthday is coming up in a little over four months, which should be just enough time for all of my friends out there to scrape together enough cash to get me almost a fourth of the purse. remember kids, sharing is caring.

anyway, so i made a minor detour to nordstrom's @ the irvine spectrum today with yumi (it was five minutes away from the client site, okay), where i almost got conned into buying four pairs of shoes. freakin' nordstrom shoe salesmen - they're so good, it's almost frightening. after ten minutes of agonizing internal debate, i picked a pair of via spiga slingbacks and a pair of cole haan sandals. but now whenever i close my eyes all i can picture are the shoes i left behind. mental note: avoid nordstrom salesmen like the plague in the future.

all right, back to work. have a fabulous rest of the week, everybody.